Total Body Cleanse- Day 2

So yesterday, after getting totally fed up with myself, my diet and fear of looking at the scale, I took it upon myself to head over to the next town in search of a detox- in- a- box.  I went to a little shop called Nature’s Storehouse, and searched their shelves; toddler in tow for the perfect detox.  I’m honestly doing this to jump start my diet again, I won’t lie, but I’m not expecting to loose weight (or any weight I loose I’m not crazy, I know it will be back) on this detox.  This is honestly just to try and restart, to feel better and to get back on track.  I feel like I say that a lot.

Total Body Cleanse

This product is described on the website as:

Total Body Cleanse is a two-week (14-day), 3-part organic internal cleansing program, blending only organic herbs and fiber to offer an effective colon and body cleanse with no extra ingredients to add stress to your body.

Part 1: Detoxify with Total Body Herbal Cleanse uses organic whole herbs used traditionally to support the liver, lungs, lymphatic system, kidneys, skin and blood. These cleansing herbs support the natural detoxification process of the body.

Part 2: Capture with Fiber Blend is a blend of organic oat bran, flaxseed and acacia fiber. Fiber is a critical component of colon cleansing, as well as organ detoxification and purification.

Part 3: Eliminate with Colon Cleanse is an effective blend of organic rhubarb root, slippery elm, fennel and marshmallow promote healthy elimination. Organic slippery elm, fennel and marshmallow also help soothe and comfort the bowel during this critical cleansing step.

So I started out yesterday, and there are a lot of pills.  In the morning it instructs to take 2 of the detox pills, and three of the fiber.  At night it’s three more fiber and the two night detox pills.  I feel like a junky.  So far I have had no side effects, except for a little light headed feeling yesterday, but that is it.  And I’m pretty sure it was from not eating, not the pills.  The box also includes extra laxatives in case “eliminations are sluggish.”

The only unfortunate part of this was my wake up call/accident Sunday night.  At work at the college, I dislocated my knee cap.  *Ouch*  Which as I’m told, can be caused by excessive weight.  So I’m stuck with a knee immobilizer and a pair of crutches, as well as a bottle of Oxycodone… yaaay.  Not exactly the best thing to detox with, I can’t even exercise.  I’m confined to my mothers house, due to the fact that my apartment is full of stairs and they aren’t exactly agreeing with me.  My husband stayed home with me yesterday to help care for our son, but I’m on my own today… *SIGH.*  Not only that but my mother isn’t exactly the most health food conscious person, her idea of a healthy meal is “wheat” bread and prepackaged deli meat.  So I’m stuck trying to find healthier alternatives to eat, while I try to detox.  It’s not going well.  Whipped Key Lime yogurt, LIFE cereal and egg salad sandwiches.  Yummy… but not exactly what I should be eating right now.

The best part in all of this, was at the hospital, after the oh- so- embarrassing part of being taken out of a crowded campus in an ambulance.  I was cared for by an old friend- now nurse, a really nice (and nice looking) guy who use to hang out with me and my ex-boy friend.  He use to work at a local liquor store… he’s The Shit.  It was weird though, talking to him, and at the end of the night we were laughing about how weird it was, that six years ago we never would have thought he would ever be putting on my pants and tying my shoes!  Good times.




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